Mental health tips for teens coming right up! Mental health is just like taking care of our physical health. The term “Mental Health” is not a bad word, it’s not “crazy”, and it isn’t something to take lightly. How to manage mental health is daily exercise, just like going for a walk or drinking water for our bodies. I’ve got five valuable tips you’re going to want to check out to get on the road to genuine joy!
Hey Parents! Children are resilient, do you really think?
As parents, we are told to feed our children a variety of foods, to get enough sleep, and to exercise. We want them to learn how to read, do chores, and be responsible. But what about their mental health? No one told me as a parent to teach my child how to deal with stress, depression, or low self-esteem; we were told children are resilient. Yet, are children really resilient?
In some instances, yes we all are resilient. But with traumatic events that cause deep wounds, resilience isn’t going to work. From the loss of a friend, a major illness or injury, physical or verbal abuse, bullying, or embarrassing events, some experiences or words, for that matter, will stick with them and affect their psyche. Heck, it happens to us parents! No one wants to be depressed, let alone their child or teenager. But how do we help them know how to manage mental health?
There are many things we can try at home before jumping to a therapist and prescriptions. **Please know I am NOT a professional counselor, nor am I trying to be. I share information I have either experienced myself or am extremely interested in. This article is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Please consult your physician before jumping into new things.**
Mental health tips for teens: the beginning
For young children knowing how to manage mental health starts with them watching you do things. They aren’t going to naturally know how to manage depression, they need you to encourage them, show them, and walk alongside them. How you react to circumstances WILL affect them positively or negatively. Their eyes are on you! React well.
My parents were big outdoor people. My mom gardened and my dad worked in the yard; we were outside doing projects and playing all the time. I learned at a young age how to develop a relationship with nature. It was not until later in life I realized how important that relationship was going to be. Nature is my #1 go-to for mental health because that’s what my parents did. For instance, gardening is essential for my mental health. There is something about putting your hands in dirt that helps reduce stress. I learned this from my mom.
The brain and nature balance: a little thing with a BIG impact
Get a load of this. National Geographic wrote, “Nature provides us essentials like clean water, food, medicines, even recreational retreats… it also helps regulate our weather and climate. But these systems are extremely fragile…we know that once they are gone, there are no replacements.” We didn’t need National Geographic to tell us this about nature. However, isn’t that statement similar to our mental health? Our brains need clean water, good food, and recreational escapes to help normalize our well-being. If we don’t get these things, our minds, too, are fragile and will break.
Probably the biggest step in helping ourselves and our teens with mental health management is to digest that we have something going on. Upon discovery, many may experience anger at first, others in denial, but others will feel relief that they finally figured out a piece of the puzzle. Does that make sense? All in all, when we can embrace it and understand it, we’ll have a better chance of managing it and living that amazing life we always envisioned.
5 Mental health tips for teens
1. Get outside
Remember that relationship with nature I started talking about? The National
Academy of Sciences performed a study that shows a simple
90-minute walk in nature {a place with trees} decreases negative thinking about
oneself. Taking a walk in an urban area like a city or industrial park has zero
effect. This study reveals that there is a “…pathway by which nature
experiences may improve mental well-being and suggests that accessible natural
areas within urban contexts may be a critical resource
for mental health…”
We may not have 90 minutes to take a walk but I’m sure we can do 20 minutes. The University of Minnesota says there’s “a growing prevalence of depression caused by ‘nature deprivation,” which is largely due to screen time… Push your kids outside. Yes, even your teenagers. Go with them. Just last night my son and I went outside and played with our dog.
As for other ideas with your teen, start an outside sport together like tennis, pickleball, or throwing the baseball around. Do a project together outside, like a garden, build a hunting blind, do yard work, or have a campfire. Don’t have a yard? Head to the park. Go for a walk. Take up fishing together. My personal favorite is gathering the family together (all ages) and doing The Ultimate Scavenger Hunt Challenge. This is so incredibly fun and inexpensive, perfect for teens to let loose and have fun! You can download the instructions in my Freebies.
Plant trees or volunteer in a park or nature event. If nature goes away; so will our sanity.
For little kids, show them how to build a fort, climb trees, make an obstacle course, look for birds or pretty flowers, or play in the snow. When my son was little I liked to grab a camera (a camera separate from a phone) and ask for certain pictures to be taken, for instance, anything that was yellow, rocks, funny-looking sticks, and things like that. My son absolutely loved it!
2. Do something kind for the body.
Our bodies take most of the brunt of stress. So instead of cursing your body, bless it! As much as my body and mind are not getting along, I’m still kind to it. When you feel good, you are kinder to yourself and others around you. Do you need to go for a run, have a yoga session, a massage, a hot bath, or a cup of tea on the couch? Do something that makes you feel better that is good and pure.
Teens, understand your love language. Parents, know what your teen’s love language is, and yours for that matter. If it is gifts you can encourage them by getting them a simple gift that brings comfort, you can get some comfort gift ideas here. Words of affirmation are powerful, these aren’t just compliments, this is speaking truth into their minds. I have a list of affirmations in my freebies you can download. First things first, understand each other’s love language. You can grab the book: The 5 Love Languages to learn more.
Pray together
And don’t forget the power of prayer. Simply giving it all to our Heavenly Father to sort out, gives us natural peace. God is in control, he loves us and wants us to live a life of love. There is nothing better and going to the source to ask for help, clarity, and healing. I also encourage prayer for protection over the Enemy. Body, mind, and spirit are all connected and affect each other.
3. Eat foods for your brain
Food matters! Your brain needs fats, good fats. And getting the clean kind in your body helps your body and brain fight off free radicals…those are the guys that destroy the good stuff. Here is a post about Omega Oils that will help you out. And don’t forget the avocados. I’ve got a great recipe here. Berries are an amazing ‘happy’ food. Stock up on blueberries, raspberries, and strawberries.
Your brain also needs to be hydrated. Drinking more water does help with mood and clarity. There are many water benefits. Stick with filtered water, there is no need to add sweetener or bubbles, your body knows what to do with plain water. Get a cool-looking water bottle and fill er’ up with some H2O.
4. Journal
I know this sounds like old news, but if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Journaling works. When our thoughts are written down on paper, more so than typed, it’s like you’ve permitted yourself to let the hurt get out of you. Writing about your journey helps process what’s going on. Journaling is a great exercise to help express emotions yet feel like they have privacy. When asked the right journaling questions, there can be a lot of healing. Plus it’s fun to shop for a fun journal.
5. Head to a hobby
A hobby can do loads for mental health. It keeps your hands busy and your mind focused on being creative…and being you! Here’s a post on hobbies with a list of different ones to try. It’s time to get creative and feel the goodness enter your heart.
Anger Management 101
I could end on that, but it’s important to reiterate that a ‘lack of understanding’ usually gets us upset in the first place. Why? Because we don’t understand! That’s why fights happen and judgments lash. We don’t know why people act the way they do, because we don’t live in their shoes. For all we know, they could be sick, have a chronic illness, be abused, have social issues, or be on drugs. And when we don’t know how to manage those things, a mess of emotions implodes and then explodes on others.
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When we have anger about something, we usually want to do something about it. I’m not talking about anger towards a person when you want to lash out at them for saying something stupid, that’s a different post. The anger I’m referring to is about how we react to either ourselves or a cause that affects other people. Some call it anger, others call it passion. You can take it a step further and call it uniqueness. There is this great book by Matthew Barnett, “The Cause Within You”. I highly recommend this book to not only inspire your own life but to motivate how to help others. Super good! And your teen would love it and find it motivating.
Moving forward- mental health tips for teens
I’d have to say the majority of people try to ignore their mental state or try to numb it with something else like drugs, alcohol, shopping, or eating. You don’t need me to say those things just leads to other issues. You can also look at these things as signs that your teen is going through a tough season.
If you have tried some natural ways to manage mental health and it’s not helping, another route would be to find a therapist, a Christ-follower if possible. The only true healer and protector is Jesus. Your church would know of someone, or you can ask some friends. Be sure you straight-up ask them if they know Jesus, if they hesitate with their answer, walk out and find a new one. For more ideas, this post from Mental Health America is a good one! I hope this post about mental health tips for teens was helpful.
How to comfort people can be confusing, so much so, that we end up doing nothing. Doing nothing isn’t the answer. We weren’t put on this planet to go through hardship alone. Let’s pull up our bootstraps, and open our hearts and our arms for those who need to lean on someone. Learn my 6 simple ways to know how to comfort hurting people.
Step #1 with how to comfort people: awareness
I admire people who can share openly what’s going on in their lives; I’m not talking about people boasting about themselves, I’m talking about people who genuinely reach out for help. Why? Because it makes me feel human and gives me a chance to help in some way or form.
It takes courage, confidence, and bravery to open up and expose our hearts to the world. As I said earlier, we weren’t made to go through storms alone, so why do we try to keep it quiet and pretend everything is “fine”? Pretending is going to help people heal; it’s just going to cause more issues down the road.
Recently, an old high school classmate of mine was going through a difficult situation. She had a choice; keep it to herself or share it. She chose to share it on social media, not for sympathy or attention, but because she needed help getting through the storm. I admire her for putting her stuff out there, especially on social media where 90% of the posts are only good things that happen in people’s lives.
My heart went out to her and her family. I knew I wanted to respond but I didn’t know what to say so I thought about it and responded to her the next day. She felt alone, you could read it even though she didn’t say it. And that struck a chord in me. Whether it was emotions, hormones, the Holy Spirit, or a soul connection, I started weeping for her broken and confused heart.
I thought back to my storm I endured years ago in my personal life, and how alone I felt. From experience, I knew the best thing I could do for her was to reach out to her, pray for her, and give her a promise that I would. Prayer does change things, and just knowing that other people are praying for you helps you put more trust and confidence in the Lord.
I believe my friend posting the updates about her situation was meant to not only keep everyone informed but for her to know who was sitting by her.
When a neighbor needs a little comfort
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“As soon as you start thinking about the needs and burdens of others, and what you can do to alleviate them, or how you can bless and build up others, you begin to establish a new identity for yourself – your true identity.” –Matthew Barnett, The Cause Within You.
A while back I was talking with my neighbor. It started as a friendly wave across the street, then she started walking toward me. I was in a hurry but knew I had to adjust my plans. She had to get a load off her shoulders and I understood the importance of a listening ear. She needed comfort in knowing someone would listen to her.
After she was finished she looked exhausted. Knowing what to say to comfort her was hard. I thought about suggesting ideas for solutions, but she didn’t ask for a solution so I just listened and told her I was sorry she was going through all of this. She didn’t want advice, she just wanted to be heard.
6 ideas to comfort hurting people:
1. Visit them
2. Send them a card with a handwritten note in the mail.
3. Pray for them.
4. Call them on the phone instead of texting.
5. Let them know you’re thinking about them.
6. Listen to them. Ask them questions. Do not make it about you.
Step #2: put yourself in their shoes
The next morning I tried to put myself in my neighbor’s shoes and asked myself if I were feeling down, what would make me feel a little bit better? This is so incredibly important and powerful. You can live with this perspective with whomever you encounter throughout your day.
Buying something for my neighbor is what I wanted to do. A gift in delicate situations doesn’t have to be big or super expensive, it’s to bring them comfort and to remind them that people are thinking of them. On this particular day, I didn’t have any flowers in my garden, so I went to the store and picked out all sorts of colorful carnations. They are inexpensive but have a lot to say. So if you’re on a budget go for the carnations.
When I got home, I arranged the flowers in a mason jar and went over to her house. A soft knock on her door was all I did and she opened it immediately. I handed her the flowers and said, “Just thought you could use these.” No other words were spoken, yet her eyes got glossy. She kindly said thank you and I left.
People with cancer
Listen up. My bestie recently was diagnosed with cancer. She is going through chemo and has unfortunately lost all her hair. I seriously admire her good spirit about all this. She is one of the happiest people I know, no matter what. However, what she found discouraging was that people would look at her weird. People she knew wouldn’t approach her and say “Hi” or “How are you doing?”. I know it’s hard to know what to say to someone going through cancer, but something is better than nothing.
People who are going through cancer already are having a tough time, ignoring them or talking about them behind their backs isn’t going to make them feel any better, it’s just the opposite. Don’t you think they have enough going on? Do more than exist. Love them as if they were part of your family because when push comes to shove, they are your family. Treat them how you would like to be treated if you were going through what they were going through.
Wrapping up how to comfort people
Comforting people doesn’t have to be awkward, it doesn’t need to be confusing, or worse ignored. The tough stuff is tough. Remember the two steps: be aware of what’s going on, and put yourself in their shoes. When you know the person well, you will know exactly what to do. Yet, if it’s an acquaintance, a simple jester of a card, flowers, or even a heart emoji will do. Keep your ears on them, shut your mouth, and allow them to process and heal in their own time.
Enjoy the silence; no no, sorry chaps, this post isn’t about the band Depeche Mode. As much as my high school boyfriend loved Depeche Mode’s “Enjoy the Silence”, I am not writing about them. Yet, I still picture a man dressed like a king wandering in the desert…I never really understood that video. ANYWAY… the King I’m referring to who also wandered in the desert is Jesus. We live in a world that thrives on speed and noise. As things spin faster and noisier; it becomes more critical to put yourself in a timeout to enjoy the silence, to listen to Jesus, and to choose for Him to guide you. Why? Because healthy solitude will fill your soul and renew your mind, this my friend will bring clarity to the steps you take each day. Learn how to reap the rewards of your ‘silence’ to feed your mental health and experience Peace in this loud world. Embrace these 4 rock-solid reasons to enjoy the silence.
Silent Night, Holy Night, All is calm, all is bright.
Silent Night, the Christmas song, was composed in 1818. This now-traditional Holiday tune debuted all because of an organ…that broke. Without the help of an ill organ who knows if this song would have surfaced; oddly, silence accelerated its success.
How does enjoying the silence help your success?
Recently I saw a commercial, not sure what it was selling, but it did leave me wondering what ‘peace’ really was. In the commercial, we see a couple who left the big city to go camping in the woods. Due to their overjoyous accomplishment of setting up camp, they were obviously seeking serenity. However, when night fell and all was calm, they were restless and frustrated. Then one of them downloaded a ‘noise app’ on their phone. It played cars honking, emergency sirens blaring, and dogs barking…all was ‘calm’ and they instantly fell asleep. What is ‘your silence’?
Our ‘silent night’ is not only where our souls settle down, but it’s where peace waits and where ideas birth. Outside of bedtime, do you intentionally turn off the NOISE?
4 Solid Reasons to enjoy the silence
1. Hearing from God
The most likely time God will talk to us is when we’re relaxed…quiet…still…and alone with Him. Jesus went away all the time to be with the Lord. Why wouldn’t we? But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed. Luke 5:16 As I said earlier this world will swallow you up with noise, drama, and distractions; so much so you’ll miss what God is trying to tell you, show you, and bless you with. When we don’t stop to be with the Lord in private, the world will devour us and we will completely miss the blessing God has for us; and this is exactly what the Enemy wants!
In Romans 12:2 Paul says, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (NIV). Make this your prayer. Spend time in healthy solitude with God to allow intimacy with Him. He wants your attention so He can love you more than you will ever know. His promises surface when you spend time with Him. There is a transformation in His presence when you make time for Him, to be alone with Him, and to rest in His arms. Do more than exist and spend time with God alone without distractions.
2. Creativity
Inc. Magazine says…awesome creative work can be achieved by shutting out the outside world, whilst you insanely focus on your craft. Do you say you’re not creative? That’s not true! My go-to for taking my mind off things is to put my colored pencils to work and get my hands busy. Develop your hobby and reap the rewards. Here is a fun and soothing adult coloring book to get you started: The Psalms in Color.
To get all the benefits of silence and creativity, not to mention, getting outside, take up gardening or walking…without the earbuds. Did you know that nature can enhance your creativity and problem-solving skills?
3. Problem-solving
Physically turning off the noise slows our thoughts. We can then think through our issues without distraction. The phrase “Sleep on it” makes a lot of sense now. There is truth in ‘sleeping on it’; not only does it help us think through things, but it restores our bodies, and reduces stress. One of the key tools I use to fall asleep and stay asleep is my white noise machine. Our family has 4 of these amazing things! Seriously, this is a game-changer and has improved all of our sleep and sanity.
4. Restoration in health
Scientifically, the Huffington Post reports that researchers found that two hours of silence daily led to the development of new cells in the hippocampus, a key brain region associated with learning, memory,and emotion. If you can’t get complete silence, the white noise machine I mentioned above is a great alternative. It helps drown out the distractions with little noises. Again, I LOVE this tool!
The Power in Silent Night
In the dancing noises of our world many of us, unfortunately, will miss these life-enhancing riches. We’ll wander in the racket and wonder why our prayer hasn’t been answered, why this particular problem still lingers, why we feel like we just exist, and why our bodies hurt all the time.
Josef Mohr, author of Silent Night, pondered on what to do about his broken organ. Christmas Eve was the next day, people were expecting music! So he hiked up a hill.
It was there where he looked down at the snow-covered village where he could be in ‘his silence’. It was there that he gained the courage to turn his poem into a legendary song.
“The trees, the flowers, the plants grow in silence; the stars, the sun, the moon move in silence. Silence gives us a new perspective.”
Mother Teresa
Enjoy the silence recap
The next day, Christmas Eve, Josef approached his organist, Franz Xaver Gruber, and within 3 hours Franz composed the melody via guitar. Silent Night has been sung ever since. Are you making an effort to be in silence every day, ‘hiking up a hill’ to get a glimpse of the big picture?
“Silence” grows, moves, and it gives. How much is ‘your silence’ worth? Recharge by spending some time in silence. You might be surprised at what you hear. If you haven’t gotten a daily devotional yet for this year, it’s never too late. One of my favorites is Jesus Calling.
Come January and February the winter blues gradually sneak up on us. Winter blues disorder is a thing. According to Cleveland Clinic having the “winter blues” is actually normal. You’re totally fine to feel a little down during the colder months. They refer to it as SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). Um, yeah, I know I get it. No matter where we live we’re bound to crave sunlight. But it’s not all about sunlight.
What can we do about the winter blues?13 Tips
Here are the best 13 ways to naturally reduce the ‘winter blues’. I go from the most common to the most unique. My personal favorites are #9 and #13.
1- Get Outside…even if it’s cloudy.
There is power in the outdoors even when it’s cloudy. Stepping outside to get the mail can even help fight off the winter blues sad symptoms. Stepping out in nature helps you feel like you did something today, that in itself, a feeling of accomplishment can mend the blues of winter. Do yourself a favor, and give yourself a change of scene, even if it’s a stroll in your neighborhood. Get some fresh air. Yo, getting outside may even help you sleep better at night. Here are a few nature quotes to get you motivated.
2- Open up the shades and pull back the curtains.
Increase the amount of sunlight in your home, again, even if it’s cloudy. Open the shades and curtains! Being closed off to the incredible beauty of creation is depressing. Stop it! Simply opening the curtains or shades during the day is so incredibly healthy for your mind and well-being. This little act makes a huge impact on your psyche. Say goodbye to the winter blues disorder!
3- Take Vitamin D
There are a lot of benefits to vitamin D. One benefit is it improves mood. Taking vitamin D3 also reduces upper respiratory infections. Other vitamin D benefits include bone health, helping the immune system, managing blood sugar levels, fighting heart disease, helping regulate hormones, contributing to memory, supporting skin health, and more. Dr. Axe has more info here. “D” gives you a dose of goodness.
4- Exercise
Beating the winter blues means working hard and outsmarting it! Who cares if it’s cloudy and gray outside? Bundle up and get out there. A bit of fresh air does a body and soul good. There have been studies on how exercise can boost mood. Have you heard of a runner’s high? It exists. But what if you don’t run? Lace-up the walking shoes or slip on the biking shorts! Aim to exercise for at least 30 minutes, an hour would be fantastic. Winter blues sad symptoms have no room in your everyday minutes when you’re heart gets pumping. I like to visualize the negativity leaving my body as I work my body.
5- Set a sleep schedule
When you’re on a sleep schedule, your body will naturally flow with it. It takes a little time, but within a week or two, you should be feeling the positive effects. Stick to all-natural ways to help you fall asleep and stay asleep. Things like avoiding electronics an hour or two before bed, dimming the lights, taking a hot bath, setting a routine, reading before bed, exercising in the morning instead of the evening, and avoiding caffeine after the lunch hour. I went as far as changing out my LED light bulbs to incandescent; yet, it’s hard to those light bulbs these days.
6- Look at what you’re eating.
A special diet to help the winter blues? Yeah, kind of. Change up your diet and eat more Omega-3 fatty acids (salmon, walnuts, flax seeds), berries, dark chocolate, and bananas are beneficial too. Source: Healthline. These types of foods give off happy vibes. I’ve got a great recipe for salmon in a skillet, find my recipe here. What you put into your body does affect how you feel. Get clear with cleaner foods and reduce inflammation with foods that calm. If you have digestive issues, be sure to check this post out, it has great information coming from someone who knows! (me).
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7- Try Light Therapy
Light therapy also helps manage the winter blues, but talk to your doctor first. There are a few lights to look at on Amazon. Here’s one that’s inexpensive to try: Miroco Light Therapy Lamp.
6 More Fun Things to Calm the Winter Blues
8- Add plants to your indoors
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Some other fun things we can do to brighten our blue months (January and February) are to bring green plants into your living space. Having plants, even if they’re fake, gives off a fresh feel to the room. Try putting a houseplant or two in your kitchen. If you don’t do well with plants, and what I mean is keeping them alive, head to your favorite hobby store or hop on Amazon and pick up some fake greens. Find other ideas on how to brighten a room here.
9- Light it up inside!
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Move your Christmas lights from your tree to other areas of your home. I have a fake tree in my house; year-round I put a string of white lights on it and turn them on in the evening and early morning. The fireplace mantel is also a great spot to have a string of lights. A few lights can go a long way! If you don’t like the typical dark green string, get the white one! You can find them on Amazon.
10- Turn your nose on
Fill your home with lovely smells. Honestly, I don’t know what it is about the smell of banana bread baking, but it brings warm hugs to my soul. Chicken soup does the same thing. Whatever your childhood favorite smell, make that smell happen! This is a low-cost method that goes a long way.
Play nature sounds. There are a lot of great nature sounds you can download. My personal favorites are the ones with birds, something that mimics my backyard in the warmer months. If the ocean is your favorite spot, tune into the sounds, and close your eyes.
12- Embrace the season
Welcome the stillness of the winter. Every year I find myself craving time alone when it’s snowing outside. Since I live in Michigan we get our share of snow. The snow has this magical way of quieting life down. Enjoy the silence of nature. One of my favorite places to be in winter is sitting in the snowbank at night…especially if it’s snowing!
13- Warm up the bones
Don’t forget to warm up your bones. If there is ever any sunshine, grab a camp chair and camp out in front of the window or door where the sunbeams shine through. I did this just the other day and my soul immediately felt better. No sun? Try your fireplace. No fireplace? Light a candle. No candles? Take a hot bath. No bathtub? A cup of dairy-free hot chocolate or tea works too…with a pair of cozy socks.
Victory over the Winter Blues
Let’s beat the winter blues at its game. Shine light where you can and warm up your soul using all your senses. Be aware of your surroundings and how you can change them. You got this!
Off-track? Want to know how to set goals and achieve them? When our goals and declarations stutter to a stop, our proactive self immediately turns into a reactive being. We get into a vicious cycle of reacting to our circumstances instead of making things happen. I’m here to help you prevent that from happening. Learn my 4 repair tricks to knowing how to achieve goals!
What ain’t gonna work
Forward is the right direction, no? As with anything moving forward, it’s a lot easier to use a flashlight than to stumble in the dark. A key to knowing how to achieve goals is to understand what throws us off. What are your triggers and how do you defeat them?
Picture this; we start the year off strong. The first week we’re super motivated. The second week it gets a little harder. The third week something happens; we’re not sure what…but we veer off course; so much so we decide to set up camp. I’ve personally been there many times. Frankly, my old patterns are comfortable, they’re easy. But friend, there is something else I’ve learned; “comfortable” and “easy” ain’t gonna getcha where ya want ta go. So let’s learn more about what trips us up in the first place.
Here are the top stumbling blocks:
L = LIES we believe.
It’s too hard. Let’s face it, when things are hard ‘quitting’ comes to mind. This year quitting is not an option. Your goals need to be challenging, but they don’t need to be hard. There’s a difference. It’s called pace and workload. It’s too hard is a lie. Are you looking for an excuse to stop? When things get hard it is SO easy for us to quit. Here’s the thing, when you quit you’re on the verge of a breakthrough, and you just missed it because you gave up. Keep moving forward. When hard things are taken step by step it’s heck-of-a-lot easier to make things happen.
THE FIX: Break down your resolution and put a plan in place. Write down what you want to do every week, then every day, then every morning and evening. Get into a routine that helps you win. I don’t care how small the step is, you’re still moving forward. Make the day count. I created a mind map that will help you take things one step at a time. This is actually a great family activity to do; you’ll hold each other accountable!
A = ACTIONS WE DON’T TAKE.
There’s a lack of motivation. When I’m unmotivated I procrastinate. I wait until I FEEL like it. Well if I waited until I FELT like it all the time, nothing would move forward and I would have regrets. There are a couple of things I’m talking about. In order to know how to achieve goals, the first is to understand the purpose. Why must this get done? What space does it fill? What piece of my goal does this satisfy? The second is the FEEL part. This is a time when you pull up your bootstraps and put the emotions aside.
THE FIX: Ask yourself, “How am I going to feel when I get this done?” If your answer is ‘relief, amazing, good, a load off’, then that means it needs to happen…make it so. This is so incredibly good for your mental help and confidence.
Z = ZOMBIE GOALS.Sabotage #3
How to achieve goals is to have specific goals. The sabotage is that our goal is not specific. It’s like we’re walking around like zombies. Let’s say my resolution is to manage my finances better; I declare “I’m going to save money this year.” Then what? Ask yourself these questions: Who? What? When? Where? How? Who is going to help me? What changes am I going to do? When am I going to review these things? Where am I going to go if I need help? How am I going to succeed? When you have the answers to these questions you have a better view of how it’s going to happen.
THE FIX: be specific when writing your goals, something like this: “I’m going to review my cash flow and budget every Thursday after work.” To help you out in the goal department I created a printable that you can get for free. Head to my Freebies.
Y-YELLERS get our attention.
We get distracted. Distraction is a HUGE sabotage! When our focus isn’t on our end goal we flounder around in circles. Some people get stuck in this pattern and find it harder and harder to break free. To break through this twister, we must intentionally turn away from the distracting force and focus on what lies ahead.
I read an article a few years ago about the power behind just seeing the word “FOCUS”; it said that it can mysteriously snap us back on track. It sounds crazy, but I tried it and it worked for me.
THE FIX: when you find yourself getting distracted, recognize what is happening and remove yourself from the distracting environment. Write the word “focus” and place it in areas where distractions linger. Take it a step further and declare your time and space to be free of distractions in Jesus’ Name. Darkness wants to throw you off course. Stand firm next to Christ, and command the negative ju-ju to leave.
And…there it is…how to achieve goals
If you haven’t quite figured it out yet, the acronym I used for goal sabotages was LAZY. Our goals fall short because we get lazy. Been there, done that! Another way to look at it is that you might say we get a “lazy eye”, not physically, but mentally. We lose sight of our WHY, why am I doing this anyway, we might ask.
The word “lazy” means: unwilling to work or use energy. Talk about a knife in the wound. Lazy isn’t a bad word, especially on your day off. But it can be used against you in all other states of affairs.
My perspective about personal goals and resolutions is this: no one is going to do it for you. If you want it, YOU have to go get it. Staying reactive to things in life isn’t life, that’s existence…you just exist. But when you use your knowledge, resources, talents, strength, and creativity to go after your own goals…that’s not only productive, that’s doing more than existing.
Take things step-by-step, check your motivation, use specifics when setting goals, and FOCUS. May you be filled with dreams, plans, and amazing goals for your soul.
