Some people are born smart, others learn how to be smart. Being smart isn’t an amazing test score, that just says you can take a test. Being smart is how to navigate through this world with the intent of making it a better place. We are reminded of stories of people who become self-made millionaires with only a high school diploma. How to be smart has nothing to do with your GPA. But it does have to do with skill and navigation, not to mention aligning your passion with your work. So how do we learn this and how do we teach our young children?
How to be smart
A skill every child and adult can develop is how to learn to be aware of their surroundings. We are naturally born with instinct; however, if you really want to succeed in life, you must learn how to pay attention. With phones, electronics, and puberty, learning how to pay attention is hard for a kid. It’s also frustrating for a parent!
This life lesson of being aware of our surroundings can enhance our ability to succeed in communication, life skills, and survival in many different situations. I’ll teach you how to help your child and yourself become more aware of using your eyes and ears and how sight and sound play an important part in how to be smart.
A fun way to get started
Me fishing!
“Shh…walk softly on the dock, we don’t want to scare the fish,” my dad instructed. It was a summer morning. The lake was like glass, not a movement of the wind. Today, at seven years old, I was going to learn how to fish. And the most important fish skill of all: awareness. Some fishermen would argue with me and say patience or the type of bait is more important, but truly it comes down to paying attention. For instance; how do you know what bait to use? How do you know where to fish? Because you are aware of how the fish responds.
We got into our boat, started the motor, and trolled to our fishing spot. My dad whispered instructions on how to bait the hook. He showed me how to adjust the bobber, and he demonstrated how to be quiet watching for signs of a hungry fish.
I wasn’t just learning how to fish; I was learning how to become more aware of my surroundings.
Wikipedia explains it like this: Awareness is the ability to directly know and perceive, to feel, or to be conscious of events, objects, thoughts, emotions, or sensory patterns.
As the world drives to go faster, it’s hard to take it all in, but knowing what to look for can make you a heck of a lot smarter than others around you. The trap we get ourselves into is that we get so focused on our to-do lists, phones, and work that we forget to stop and look around to see what’s happening in our relationships, our children, and our overall path in life. And we wonder why nothing is changing.
Two major events helped me understand how important it was to be aware of my surroundings. One was fishing. The other was when I endured a rare sickness.
How being sick helped me
How to be smart doesn’t always come naturally; it is a skill that can be learned. When I was pregnant with my son I had a rare pregnancy disease that robbed me of energy, joy, and time. My body suffered, so much so, that the tiniest movements made me ill. For months on end, I was nauseous, weak, and dumbfounded that this was happening to me.
Not only that but my body was snatched of nutrients and vitamins, so much so, that my body was actually eating itself. That’s when your body eats itself because you’re not getting enough nutrition from food…in which food wasn’t staying down. It was extremely difficult for others to understand what I was going through, especially if they had been pregnant before without having issues.
However, while going through this torturing sickness I noticed the love and compassion of others. Never had I paid attention to it before because I wasn’t the receiver of it. My awareness of how powerful a card was, how impactful a visit was, how humbling a listening ear was, and how a small smile from a stranger made me feel gave me joy, it gave me hope, and it taught me what matters in this world.
Not only that, but I also became more aware of the power and reality of spiritual presence. My faith grew stronger every day I suffered; I became more aware of His grace and protection. But I had to seek Him to get it. If I hadn’t endured this suffering my eyes would have missed these little gems of light in our broken world.
How to be smart with your eyes and ears
Open your eyes
You probably were thinking you’d get a list of sudoku puzzles or crossword puzzles to make you smarter, yes those games will exercise your brain, but they don’t teach you how to love or sense that others around you are dying for a “hello”. With that said, open your eyes and learn how to look for things. This can help your kids and your teens for that matter.
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The simple exercise helps us to pay attention to even the smallest details. Do you know those “Hidden Picture” games in kid magazines? Or the Where’s Waldo books? These games are great exercises for enhancing our skills of paying attention. I would qualify myself as a Master Finder, not only in these games but in finding things around the house and in the store. Having the challenge to find something gets me going. This may sound silly and childish, but these games work to help you become more aware.
Lately, my tween son is in that phase of asking me where everything is. My answer varies from, “It’s your responsibility to keep track of your own stuff” to “If you can’t find it, you can’t have it.” When in fact the item he is looking for is literally right in front of his face. I’m not trying to be mean by not helping him find it, I’m trying to teach him the skill of looking.
How to be smart at finding things
Tip #1: when finding certain objects whether it be inside or outside, look for a piece of the object, not just the whole thing. Rarely is the entire object going to be visible. Look for a part of it. This technique works for fishing and hunting too.
Tip #2:envision yourself finding it. What reaction will you have? Will you pause and whisper to yourself that you found it or will you yell in excitement? Visualize yourself finding the object.
Tip #3: Lastly, but firstly, pray to God to help you find whatever it is that you’re looking for. He knows exactly where it is, so why not ask him to help you find it? Most importantly, listen for his hints of where to look.
Seriously these tips work. It not only applies to finding objects, but it helps you to know how to look for things or pick up on cues from others. It’s all in the details.
Use your ears
Like using your eyes, use your ears too. Ears come in handy when it’s dark or when you’re lost in the woods. I know this is obvious and basic, but life is fast and there are some things we just plain forget to tell our children. Have you heard the lesson about listening for the road when you’re lost in the woods? How about listening for a car coming when you’re riding your bike on the road?
When talking with others, listening is key to becoming smarter. If you shut your mouth and let the other person talk, you’re already smart. People who talk a lot generally have lower self-esteem. Just know that gives you an understanding and a direction in how to navigate the conversation. While you’re listening to others talk, ask them questions, and be curious, they need something, and having you listen to them is just what they might need. This, folks, is smart. Help your friend get out what they need to and help them come to their conclusion in solving their problem.
“Listen with curiosity. Speak with honesty. Act with integrity. The greatest problem with communication is we don’t listen to understand. We listen to reply. When we listen with curiosity, we don’t listen with the intent to reply. We listen for what’s behind the words.”
― Roy T. Bennett
Tips with listening
Tip #1: If you’re in a strange place, unplug the earbuds. Pay attention to the sounds around you.
Tip #2: If you’re having a conversation with someone, listen to what they’re trying to tell you. There is more behind the words they say. Like when I was enduring the sickness. People understood that what I was really telling them was that I felt alone and needed comfort. Be aware of what they’re really trying to say, then act on it.
Tip #3: As in fishing or hunting, use your ears for clues of where they are. Is there a splash in the water? Are there leaves rustling or twigs snapping?
Wrapping this all up
Be aware of the peace that is offered daily by nature, the kindness that is freely given by others, and the small blessings that are awarded without reason. This, my friends, is how to be smart. I encourage you to stop and look around; for I know you’ll be amazed by what you see and find and to build this skill as much as possible, for it will help you in more ways than one.
Smiling is more than an expression of how you feel. Simpling reduces stress! A smile can also have positive effects on those you smile at, and could even set the course of your day. It’s crazy how a simple action can have huge rewards. Learn more about how smiling reduces stress and the benefits smiling has on others. A little smile will do you good.
The expression on our face
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In Dale Carnegie’s book How to Win Friends and Influence People, a book every young twenty-something should read, Dale says “The expression on one’s face is far more important than the clothes one wears on one’s back.” Not only that but Dale also mentions what Professor James V McConnell, a psychologist at the University of Michigan says about smiling, “People who smile tend to manage, teach and sell more effectively, and to raise happier children.”
A campus visit, what I saw shocked me!
A while back I visited my alma mater. When I was there I noticed something strange…no one was smiling. I even did the ‘smile test’ in the women’s restroom, you know, when you smile at someone and they smile back? Well, that’s what is supposed to happen, but it didn’t work! I felt invisible. And shocked for that matter. So I tried again in the hallway. Still nothing! When I went outside, I tried again. Not even a look in the eyes! This was getting quite comical.
When I got home from my campus visit, I told my recruiter friend who visits many college campuses what I experienced and how sad I was about the emotionless students. She told me that it isn’t just happening there, the ‘no smiling’ thing is happening on other campuses too. What the heck? Life isn’t that bad, you’re in college!
Stress is a crazy and life-altering thing. We all know that stress can cause us to make poor decisions. It can make our bodies ill and imbalanced. How can we reduce stress naturally and simply? First, we need to understand how some hormones work.
Endorphins are the ‘feel good’ hormones’. They are produced in your brain to help reduce stress, relieve pain, and improve your mood. What naturally releases endorphins? Exercise can help improve your mood and reduce stress. But what if you don’t want to exercise? You can simply smile or even force a smile. Intermountain Healthcare says, “When you smile, your brain releases tiny molecules called neuropeptides to help fight off stress. Then other neurotransmitters like dopamine, serotonin, and endorphins come into play too. The endorphins act as a mild pain reliever, whereas the serotonin is an antidepressant.”
What’s the big deal about a smile?
Smiling is a natural, automatic expression we reveal when we are happy or when we feel good. Psychology Today says we pretty much need to smile to stay sane! I don’t know about you, but after a pandemic, political warfare, and pure evil, I think we all better get our Smile on.
Here’s a minor example about smiling; when I was in college I remember a time when I was walking through the Arboretum. On the way to class, a stranger smiled at me. As a natural response, I immediately smiled back. In fact, I remember my smile was over-exaggerated because I was so shocked he smiled! Throughout that day I thought of the smile moment and it honestly made my whole day! I even remember telling my roommates that some random guy smiled at me, not like a slimy-lets-go-on-a-date look, but a ‘hey, hope you’re having a nice day’ kind of smile.
Smiling makes us feel good and it boosts our confidence.
I didn’t know how to smile!
In Kindergarten I didn’t know how to smile. Yep. I had no idea. My sisters tried to teach me but I just couldn’t get the corners of my mouth to go up on cue. Who knows, maybe I was stressed as a kid? Anyway, school picture day was coming up. I desperately wanted to smile, but every time I tried, my lips clamped shut and the corners of my mouth turned down.
How did I learn to naturally smile? With lots of tickling by my sisters in front of the mirror, I finally understood the smile. By 3rd grade, I was smiling on demand. Yes, it took me that long to get it down. Who would have known in my Senior year in high school I got voted ‘best smile’. 🙂
Kindergarten Not quite.2nd Grade Getting closer.3rd Grade Nailed it!1st grade was so bad I scribbled on it.
Smile and watch what happens!
If we simply smile more often, we’re going to be happier, less stressed people. Smiling around your kids is a big one. They need to see that you are happy more often than angry. You may have to force a smile at times too, and that’s okay! You deserve to feel good and they deserve it too.
Smiling reduces stress in not only you but also in others who receive your smile. Smiling says many things beyond what words, e-mails, tweets, texts, or instant messaging could say. Don’t discredit the smile. Keep on smiling before you forget how to do it, it does make life a lot more rewarding.
All in all
When you smile, people will be curious about who you are because you look happy. People seek happiness and they want whatever is making you show your teeth. Let’s put our phones down, take our earbuds out, and pay attention to people walking to class or in the grocery store, heck even in the car next to you. Smile and see what they do in return. A little smile will do you good.
Before you go, check out these other posts about reducing stress naturally
Whether you need a gift idea to physically comfort someone or gift ideas to emotionally comfort them, I’ve got 9 gift ideas to warm the body and soul. These are simple, practical gift ideas that can be used daily. Let’s move beyond the candles and blankets; as well as fuzzy socks and scarfs. Try something different this year, choose a gift people will use and love. Here are nine great gift ideas that will make a lasting impression on them.
Gift ideas #1: Leg Warmers
Leg warmers were a big hit in the ’80s largely due to the movies Fame and Flashdance; not to mention the exercise aerobics. They may have been a fashion statement, but leg warmers are very functional and practical if I don’t say so myself! With leggings and skinny jeans trends, leg warmers are perfect to slide over your legs before going for a walk or walking the dog! I simply slide them over my leggings on cold days and head outside…perfect! Leg warmers are a great gift for people who live in the city and walk to work, for college students walking to the gym, and for dog owners on cold days. I recommend these leg warmers on Amazon, pick your color!
Gift ideas #2: Heating pads
Heating pads. This sounds like an old person. Hear me out though, heating pads are an awesome way to get the blood flowing to the areas of your body to heal. They don’t just naturally ease sore muscles, but they give you peace of mind. Heating pads are portable, which is great for travel or sitting on the couch. There is nothing more comforting than a warm heating pad against your aches and pains. If you don’t have access to a bathtub or hot shower, a heating pad is the next best thing to warm the bones and bring a sense of calm to your heart. Great for camping/glamping!
#3: Hot Chocolate (Dairy-free!)
Hot cocoa – Dairy Free. Yes, it exists. For those of us who need to be dairy-free due to digestive distress, this hot cocoa is simply delicious. Let’s face it, there is nothing more soothing and joyful than sipping on a cup of hot cocoa. It not only warms your insides, but it warms up the childhood memories from playing in the snow. When I had to go dairy-free, not to mention gluten-free, I couldn’t have hot chocolate anymore. However, Swiss Miss now makes a dairy-free version! And I gotta say, it’s fantastic. If you have a dairy-free friend, a cup of hot cocoa would be an awesome gift. You can easily get this on Amazon.
#4: Epson Salts (this is my favorite)
Epson Bath Salts: these are my favorite all year round. Epson salts aren’t just for after a chiropractic adjustment or massage appointment, they are for everyday use to release your muscle tightness and rid toxins from your body. They even have Epson salts infused with essential oils, which enhance the bath experience and give your body and mind extra care. My personal favorite is Dr. Teals Chamomile. When I smell the scent of these Epson salts my mind immediately releases and melts into the tub. This is one of the best comforting gift ideas if you have a bath lover.
#5: Mini Electrical Fireplace
Small electrical fireplace: This might sound silly, but these small electrical fireplaces are so nice to have around. These days, they are very affordable and portable! They are easy to use and instantly bring warmth to your room both physically and mentally. There is nothing better on a cold winter’s day than a glowing fireplace. You don’t need a fancy fireplace to get the same warm fuzzies. What I love about electrical fireplaces is that you can turn on the flames without the heat, because sometimes, you might just want the ambiance without the extra heat.
#6: Essential Oils
Essential Oils: essential oils were the craze in the 20-teens, but they are still beneficial for the mind and body. My essential oils are used every day, mainly for mental goodness, but also for sore muscles. I do have my go-to oils, but there are some no-fail oils to give as gifts, like Tea Tree, Lavender, Peppermint, Lemon, and Frankincense. A little bit goes a long way and gives our senses a treat and healing. You can get a nice variety of oils for under $10 on Amazon.
Gift Ideas #7: Instrumental Music
William Augusto: Soaking in His Presence instrumental music. I usually don’t say much about music because everyone has their own taste, but this one is a must. When you just want to escape your reality without having to think about lyrics, this album is a keeper. Soaking in His Presence is beautiful, soft, and welcoming. Love, love, love this! When I want to feel closer to God Almighty, I play this music and pray. This is great when you’re driving and just need a minute to relax and calm your road rage. 😊
#8: Flowers
Flowers never get old. This is a great birthday gift idea and this is especially a great Mother’s Day gift idea. Add color to their kitchen table. This simple gift gives the gift of peace. Seriously, flowers are known to promote positive thinking and reduce stress! Talk about great gift ideas to comfort someone. Head to your local grocery store, Trader Joe’s, ALDI’s, or Costco to get some amazing deals on flowers.
Gift ideas #9: Silk Pillowcase
Silk pillowcase: this has been a game-changer in my sleep…for the better. A silk pillowcase is not only soft and cool, but it’s good for your hair! My husband even loves them. I know that a silk pillowcase sounds a little cheesy, but it is the bomb. If you don’t have one yet, I encourage you to get one for yourself! My husband loves his!
Wrapping it up!
In wrapping up these great gift ideas to comfort someone, I’m sure you found at least one of them to be a perfect fit for your friend or family member. Note: these gifts can not only be for Christmas gifts, but for Mother’s Day gifts, Father’s Day, Birthday gift ideas, and even gifts to mend a broken heart. May these gift ideas refresh and bring joy to yourself and those you care about. Surprise someone with one of these thoughtful yet practical gifts.
The joy in giving gifts is a way to show others that they matter to you. Gifts are an actual love language. The gift doesn’t need to be an expensive or elaborate present. Gift-giving is a great and easy way to show your fellow neighbor, friend, or family member that you appreciate them. Whether it’s a birthday party, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, a spur-of-the-moment, or the Christmas season, we have some gift ideas for hard-to-buy people, including kids who have everything. Simple acts make a big impact.
Gift IdeasAdults
Make it personal
What about personalizing a gift? This is so awesome for those hard-to-buy people. At GiftsForYouNow.com you can find anything to personalize. This online store is so cool! From grilling tools to home décor, get their name or your children’s names on something you know they’ll cherish. You must check it out: GiftsForYouNow.com
Gift ideas for feet? Ew
Feet? Listen up, it’s not that gross. Feet are our stabilizers. When our stabilizers are sore or not feeling right, then the rest of our body can suffer. Do you know someone who is on their feet all day? Get their shoe size and width and surprise them with a gift that gives back…to their health and happiness!
Cramped toes & tired feet
Cramped toes equal deformity. When deformity starts to happen in feet, comfortable shoes can become an issue. Here are some gift ideas for feet that need a little love.
Toe separators can give your toes a nice stretch. These are amazing for lounging around the house after a long day in narrow shoes. I’ve tried a variety of separators from expensive to inexpensive and found these toe socks are simply easier and more comfortable to lounge around in. Check them out on Amazon!
Crocs on Amazon
A pair of Crocsgives your toes the ability to spread out naturally, not only that, Crocs are light on your feet and versatile. Crocs have come a long way. From fashionable styles to the mainstay look, They come in a variety of colors!
Oofos! These slides give your feet a little break when you still have to be on your feet. Remember, if your feet don’t feel good something else in your body probably doesn’t feel good. Check these gems out on Amazon!
Cold feet? Do you know a sports fan who sits in the cold? What about a hunter? Snow lover? Grabber toe warmersare fantastic gift ideas for hard-to-buy people. These toe warmers and hand warmers are great stocking stuffers too! Simply open the package and expose them to the air and they will start working, no shaking, no snapping. These hand and toe warmers will last for hours. All natural ingredients too! Get a pack on Amazon. Seriously, these are the best!
Chocolate!
When all else fails, chocolate to the rescue! Chocolate is an awesome gift for any chocolate lover. But! It has to be good chocolate. I have tried many chocolates in my life, from Drug Store chocolates or fancy organic chocolates, yet nothing beats See’s Candies. See’s Candies is by far the best. These handcrafted treats have been around since 1921! They certainly know what they are doing. What is even more awesome is that their chocolates are gluten-free! If you have a person in your home or family who needs to be gluten-free and loves chocolates, head over to See’s.
Gift ideas for REALLY hard-to-buy people
If there is nothing you can think of I resort to a combination of a fun snack like beef jerky or fancy mixed nuts along with Lottery Scratch-Off tickets. Yep. Nothing like a handful of fun scratch-offs! And, actually, one of the tickets I gave to someone for a gift won $85 bucks! This is great for Father’s Day.
Hold up! That’s not all. Something that is practical yet personal is a chunk of meat. If they like a good steak, head to the butcher counter and get them one! Maybe grab some Steak Seasoning and poof…an amazing gift! Everyone likes FOOD! Go for fancy cheese, or if they have a complicated diet grab a gift card to Trader Joe’s or a specialty food shop!
More gift ideas for hard-to-buy people include magazines or a subscription to monthly wine, flower arrangements, or cigars. Don’t forget about a nice pen or a good old coffee mug.
What about the kids?
Birthdays and Christmas, maybe even Easter are big gift holidays. Usually, kids can be pretty easy to shop for. But what about the kids you don’t know all that well, like your sister’s grandkids or your cousins? Sure you can get them a gift card, but to them, a gift card isn’t a shopping spree, it’s a piece of plastic. It’s plastic. Um, plastic. Kids like to open something colorful or unexpected.
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Lego
Lego is pretty much a hole-in-one when it comes to gifts for both boys and girls, especially if they’re around the ages of 5 -10, or even older! The colorful bricks and creative builds are sure to spark their interest. Not only that, but it helps keep them busy and they use their brains. For the record, it’s LEGO, not LEGOS. I’ve been corrected one too many times. Heck, you can even get them a subscription to LEGO MAGAZINE! We got this for my son and he loved it!
Race Track
Race track. Yep. A car race track with controls is AWESOME! Again, any gender loves these things, trust me. You know what? Adults would probably like this as well! When my son got a race track I think I played with it more than he did, and he played all the time!
Educational
Little Passports. This is a fairly new concept for me. Because of a lot of homeschooling that is happening nowadays, this gift is a gift that keeps giving. You gotta check them out. Their products start at ages 3 and go to ages 9+. It’s a monthly subscription. You pick the subject and length of the subscription, then they ship your gift to your gift receiver every month depending on the length of subscription you picked. In the box, they’ll get all sorts of fun things that will help teach them about that particular subject. It’s a great idea for your grandkids or your kids. I wish I had something like this when I grew up! Who doesn’t like to get a package in the mail? Little Passports is the way to go.
This is USA Edition Ages 7-12
This is Little Explorers Ages 3-5
Wrapping it up
That wraps up gift ideas for hard-to-buy people. Get it? WRAPS! My hope is that you’ll enjoy giving gifts now that you have some fresh ideas or refreshed suggestions. All in all, it is the thought that counts. But let’s put some surprises in that next gift-giving opportunity.
Before you go check out these great posts for more inspiration!
